Tag Archives: living in Mexico

Modern Day Marias–Cali, the nomad

In Bethlehem, and later in Egypt, how did Maria manage household affairs?  Did the merchants take advantage of her youth, her inexperience, her foreignness?  Did she long for family?  We know that after the threat King Herod presented ended with his death, Jose moved his family back to Nazareth, where both he and Maria were from originally.  Did Maria  “considereth a field, and buyeth it: with the fruit of her hands she planteth a vineyard”? (Proverbs 31:16)  

Today’s Modern Day Maria, Cali, is still searching out a home and community.  Unless you too have left everything behind to start out on this journey of finding home you can not understand the incredible effort such an undertaking requires.  

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In 2010, my husband was arrested for a crime he committed 8 years prior.  He went to prison for 2 years and then was deported with a ban for life in 2012.  I sold all of my possessions and left for Mexico with our 2-year-old.  We have been here 5 years this coming May.

Coming from a life of parenting alone for 2 years in the US due to my husband’s incarceration, I had already been living a life without family support and often felt alone.  Since moving to Chihuahua, Chihuahua we have experienced a ton of support and love from my husband’s family. For many of them, it was the first time meeting me. There’s not a lot of activities for kids here and the city is most definitely not the prettiest, well, not in my eyes anyway,  but I love the family unity I found.  They help give me strength to make it day by day.

Although I’m improving, I continue to struggle to speak Spanish which means I don’t socialize much. The people seem nice and often approach us to make conversation. Although I will say that when going to places to buy things, we are usually asked to pay more what they would offer the same service or product to a Mexican.

Since realizing that we will not be returning to the US, we are no longer tying ourselves down to this city but spreading our wings and adventuring to another city called Puerto Penasco. It is my dream to live near an ocean. Also, there is a large mix of Mexicans and Americans there and I look forward to socializing more with them.

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Modern Day Marias–Maggie the provider

Were there days that Maria regretted her decision to go with Jose, first to Bethlehem and then later to Egypt? Were there times when she felt like she just couldn’t even get out of bed to face the day? Did she need to take on outside work to help in the lean times when Jose didn’t have any furniture orders? How did she manage?

Today’s modern day Maria, Maggie,  “is like the merchants’ ships; she bringeth her food from afar. She riseth also while it is yet night, and giveth meat to her household and a portion to her maidens.” (Proverbs 31: 14-15)  Read and be inspired!

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You can call me Maggie. I am from Los Angeles, CA. My husband and I met at my prior job. He was granted a voluntary departure which allows a non-citizen to leave the US without an order of removal on record. He is not allowed to reapply for a visa for 10 years afterward. We have 4 more years to go until he can request readmission. We now live in Tijuana, Baja California, Mexico.

Everything in my life has changed. My family and friends are distant. My husband and I argue more. Our entire lifestyle, our way of life, our everyday routines have changed.  My belief system has changed.  I’ve changed.  I’m often depressed.  I have no motivation.  I’m angry.

We have adapted to the daily border crossing life. My kids had to get used to crossing every day at 4 am for school. For the first 2 years, we didn’t have a car. We had to use public transportation to cross from one country to the other. Border life means leaving before the sun comes out and always getting home after the sun sets.

There were so many things I just took for granted before moving to Mexico. The first year in Mexico we didn’t even have hot water. Winter was VERY cold. For 3 years we used a camping stove attached to a propane tank. The feeling when you get your first stove after so many years is like Christmas morning. Having a stove meant that we could bake cakes or a turkey. It meant a safer kitchen. It was a wonderful day for us.

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I miss a warm home, a better way of living, not struggling to get to work or school. I don’t know what keeps me going some days. My husband has missed out on our kids’ middle and high school graduations among other milestones because he could not cross the border to be with us. My children struggle to accept this life. They are both now in college working on saving money to move at the end of the school year back to the states.

I work a regular part-time job across the border.  I own two home based businesses. Margret Ruiz Photography (Instagram, Twitter, and Facebook) and Margret’s Fabulous Creations (Instagram and Facebook). I am also involved in several non-profit organizations including Baja Sand and the Lupus Foundation of America.  I lost my favorite aunt to Lupus the first year our life was uprooted.

I co-founded a charity in Rosarito called Cumpliendo Sueños (Making Dreams Come True). I donate my photography services and gowns so that girls who otherwise couldn’t are able to have a Quinceñera party. Please consider donating your time or resources so that even more girls can have their dreams come true.

Margret Ruiz Photography- Maggie is a family & Wedding Photographer based in San Diego CA. and Baja California Mexico and is always willing to travel.

I love doing military homecoming photography shoots in San Diego. When I do shoots like this I do them with more passion than any other shoot. I get emotional. It’s that feeling of seeing someone after a long time. The adrenaline and happiness and excitement one gets are amazing. I was apart from my husband for 4 months when this all started and I always relive all those feelings when I do a homecoming.

My current goal is to reach a certain level of income as a photographer. I am reaching towards that goal by more networking and investing more in my business. I am in need of a new camera. Mine is over 6 years old. It’s a struggle every time I have a shoot. If you care to help me help others through photography, you can donate via Paypal at margretruizphotography@yahoo.com.  Thank you.

I’d just like to add that we value life and everything we have more now than ever.  We don’t take for granted all of the little things we have.  We reuse and find uses for old or broken things instead of throwing them out.   We might fight more but we love each other more. No marriage or family is perfect. We are more humble, more thankful and blessed to be together.  Mexico has been a learning experience for us all.

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Modern Day Marias–Maria, an indomitable woman

What was Maria’s life like in Egypt?  She was a foreigner, unfamiliar with the best places to buy meat or flour, unsure of her welcome in the community.  Did she keep to herself, hiding behind her new roles as mother and wife, or more likely,  did she take on tasks within the community and become a woman other women sought out for counsel or assistance?

Today’s Modern Day Maria is the latter.  She has always been liberal in sharing her wisdom in our virtual community of women here in Mexico.  Her words have soothed many a troubled heart.  Her wisdom has lit the candle of hope for others.  It can be said of today’s Maria that “Strength and honour are her clothing”  (Proverbs 31:25) and “She openeth her mouth with wisdom; and in her tongue is the law of kindness.” (Proverbs 31: 26).  Here is her story.

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I’m Maria. I go by Maria De Acosta as I’ve adopted my husband’s family name as I have no family of my own. I am from California. I now live in a small village on the Sea of Cortez on the Baja Peninsula. I am here by choice 10 years – how it came about is a very long, personal story. I met my husband here in Mexico. I had known his family for many years. He moved back to town and his family introduced us. I knew my in-laws for years before meeting my husband, so it was an easy transition to a family relationship. I loved my mother-in-law dearly. My father-in-law stays to himself. My husband’s sister is the head of the family and is very supportive of me.

Has my life changed? Incredibly so! I am forever a foreigner in a foreign land. I will live out my life here in Mexico. I find myself closer to the people of this town and find a richness of life I’d never known before. I’m able to serve the community as a volunteer in the veterinary clinic and dental clinic. I love it passionately. Living in service is a true privilege! I want to learn to use the anesthesia machine at the veterinary clinic, and I want to be trained to clean teeth at the dental clinic. Much opportunity is here.

I learn every day the value of simplicity, making do, repair and reuse. As to belief system, I do not hold to a religion. I hold myself to being honest, kind, helpful and ethical – that will never change! I realize I am more intelligent, capable and gifted, stronger emotionally than I ever knew. Since moving to Mexico, I speak Spanish better. I wish to become fluent in Spanish but have no formal teacher – everyone in town is my teacher. I want to become as fluent in Spanish as I am in English.

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Like Eartha Kitt said whenever she’d come onstage, “I’m still here!” This means I’ve overcome the challenges, persevered and not only have survived them but welcome them into my being. The most defining moment of my life was when I swam out of my house in a flood with two kittens in my arms, got to safety on high ground. I heard there were two people still in their homes on the river, so immediately put the kittens into a car with a couple of guys staying out of the hurricane; I was the only woman to volunteer to be one of 5 people to go back down into the river to search for these people. They were found hanging on the window bars of their house. Their lives were saved that night.

I have lived through several hurricanes and floods. I faced death several times in the first hurricane/flood. I have lived in less-than-desirable conditions and have suffered and seen suffering and death. I have saved my own life and saved the lives of others, human and animal alike. I have not run from this to escape; I am still here. Goodness has come from this that has changed my life forever and contributed to the tempering of my heart, mind, and soul to make me a better person – I hope a better example of humanity.

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I’ve done a lot of living in my 65 years. I have a house to live in now. I designed it and my husband built it. Life here in the desert village of Mexico I call home is very tough and isn’t for everyone. I’ve seen people come and go in this town and can tell with a glance who will stay and who will leave. It’s as if the town itself, not the people who are always gracious and welcoming, but Nature here Herself, who chooses to embrace you or cast you out. So far, She has chosen me to stay here and I feel calls me her child.

I have dreams of doing a bit of travel. It’s been my life’s dream to travel throughout Mexico. Summers are hard for me – the heat, humidity, and isolation. Looking forward to the Winter Season of activity and service to the community helps get me through. I have too much free time, unfortunately, particularly in the 5-6 months of summer. I write when something comes to my spirit and wishes to be said. I am a singer. I am looking for a music system to replace the one lost in the flood – I feel if I can sing again, a big part of my soul that is hurt and damaged will be healed. (I’m surprising myself now as these words flow forth, just watching them and realizing their candor and truthful directive). I make aged cheese and roast coffee. My goal is to be self-sufficient and use locally-sourced products. I am putting my husband’s daughter through university. The financial burden is troubling.

I’m inspired by people who are living in service of others – not to change things, impose their values on others, but to enhance lives. This is exciting to me and utterly worthy of respect and assistance. I want to stay active and of service as long as I can. To do this I am taking a yoga class. I’m 65 years old and wish to keep my joints flexible and muscles toned well into old age.

If I could it all over again, I’d have matured quicker as a young person and chosen a clarity of life sooner. I’d have chosen to study well in college.

When you’re faced with life or death, you choose life, I’ve learned. One day death will choose me. I know that death is only a breath away at any time, but until it appears I will go on living ethically and hopefully giving beauty to this planet I call home.

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